continuing on

Today has been another day - my husband got paid which left very little. After paying for the room, groceries, gas, two small bills there is nothing left and the storage payment will not get paid again. I go from being so down I could let go of the wheel when I'm driving it would then be over for me and I would feel sweet release. I cannot do that because whether I like it or not I am the glue that holds this sinking ship together even if I don't want to be. Why can't I be like a lot of other weak people and why am I not weak? I was always told I was nothing, useless and unable to do anything on my own.Why do I have to be so bull headed about it all. There seems like it will never end and with that we got another "sorry we at the church cannot help you". Is there really no one who helps someone else at all.




Well, as I promised here are some other things I have learned:

1.  You can with a lot less then you think you can - I have learned and made some amazing dinners that are simple and yet good. We have a microwave, toaster oven and wok in our room to use. There is also a two burner stove but it is not really that helpful and it makes the room hot.

2.  We have a few friends who help us keep healthy food and one of those people bought us a small chest freezer. It is awesome to have and we have a small dorm size refrigerator that does a pretty good job for fresh veggies like lettuce, celery . . .

3.  I often take leftovers of pizza and divide it up in foil then freeze. I buy a bag of chicken breasts - its 5 lbs for 10.00 and when I cook them I cut them up in bite size pieces and stir fry. It keeps the meat tender and juicy. We also use low carb wraps to make chicken and veggie wraps.

4.  I use towels, sheets and toilet paper from the hotel. We don't pay for it and I don't have to wash any of it. That cuts down on how much laundry I need to do.

5.  As for our dogs I put trash bags on bottom pieces of the furniture in case of accidents. They also off and on wear belly bands with feminine pads I get as free samples in the mail.

Well, that is enough of this and I am stopping for now. I may have more then on entry for each day so don't be surprised. I plan to use this to help me deal with the way I feel at times.